As I prayed about my Wednesday post, the Lord gave me……NOTHING NEW! Not a new word. NADA. Nil!
He did, however, impress upon my heart that I should do a re-post of a piece from 2011. It was not an easy post to write then because it involved confession and admission that I had allowed jealousy to invade my heart. It has not been an easy post to re-visit 4 years later. I’m not sure why the Lord is having me post this one again, but in obedience to what I believe He is directing…..here it is.
I never saw it coming.
In fact, I have no idea where it came from, but oh my goodness, it definitely came and intended to stay a while. Jealousy. Covetousness. It was an ugly within my heart that took me by total surprise. Even now, as I look back on it, the only explanation I have for it is that it was a scheme of Satan.
I allowed jealousy of one friend’s relationship with another friend to fester and take root in my heart. I felt anger and resentment at one friend because she was occupying so much of my other friend’s time. My bitter thoughts threatened to engulf me.
At first I did not recognize it as jealousy.
My pride stepped into the picture.
“You, Leah, are a far too mature a Christian to deal with something like jealousy,” whispered the father of lies.
What a lie!
Neither I, nor anyone else, am immune to his evil manipulations. Oh, he almost succeeded in his efforts to swallow me up in a wave of jealousy.
BUT……
For years I have consistently prayed for the Lord to show me anything in my heart and life that does not please Him. This is a dangerous prayer, friend, because He is liable to do just that, and what He reveals is usually painful. In a moment of clarity, my eyes were opened and I saw the jealousy for what it was. It was an UGLY in my heart. It was S-I-N and it had to be dealt with. It had to be confessed—to God and to another human. I needed God’s forgiveness, and human accountability.
I told God that I was sorry, and asked Him to please help me do away with it. I shared my struggle with my husband. In a loving, yet very manly, matter of fact way, he told me that I should tell my friend how I had been feeling.
I was horrified.
I can’t let her know how petty and childish I have been feeling!
Pride, again.
God made it clear that, oh yes, I can let her know, and I did. In that moment of transparency with my friend, I found that the jealousy was gone.
Together, God and I slayed the green-eyed monster.
What UGLY is residing in your heart? Will you take it to the foot of the cross and leave it there?
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Linking up on Friday with Grace & Truth!!
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